Happy Easter!!

What an amazing day. Good Friday was sobering for me. We went to visit our old church, since Zac didn't have to lead an evening service at our current church. It was so wonderful to see old friends--people who have been like family to us for the past 5 years. It felt like no time had passed but it also felt like we hadn't been there forever. Weird.

Anyway, as I ponder the suffering of Christ I am thankful for a perspective that God gave me during a time of suffering in my life. I've shared this story with many of you because it is just so powerful to me but every time I think about it I still cry. When I was about to undergo radiation treatment for cancer, I was facing the prospect of weaning Joel immediately (and he nursed every 2 hours around the clock--it was the ONLY thing that made him stop crying for the entire 3 months of his life, thus far), and then being separated from him for a whole week--no holding, touching, comforting, or even seeing him really. I was supposed to stay on a different floor of the house. I remember sitting downstairs listening to him cry and feeling my heart break because I, his mom, could not go to him and he was crying out for me. One night as tears were streaming down my face, I cried out to God saying, "God, how can you do this? Joel needs his mommy, how can you let him suffer this way? Don't you love him?" And at that moment I really felt God in heart saying, "Yes, I love him. I love him so much that I sent MY son to die for your son and for you. I know the pain of watching your son suffer and being separated from him and hearing him cry out but not going to him. Trust in me and this love I offer you. I will be Joel's Savior."

And He was during that week and hopefully will be forever. This is the love that Christ made possible for all of us by his death on the cross. And today, we celebrate it's permanence, magnificence, and miraculousness. He didn't stay dead--he is alive and moving mightily in ths world!