One of my favorite things...

is to take all four kids to the doctor by myself. Uh, or not.

Actually, I would call our trip today very successful (if you don't count the hour I had to wait at the pharmacy) and it apparently was needed because Joel was right when he told me he had a "science infection" (sinus). Hehe.

Little daddy.

A couple of weeks ago during "rest" time (that is a very loose term around here these days :) I asked Joel and Jesse to be nice and quiet in their room because I was going to try and rest too. Joel asked why and i said it was because I was tired. "Why?", he asked again. "Well, because I have to get up with Bronwyn several times at night to feed her when she's crying. He looked shocked that all of this was going on in the household without his knowledge.

Since then, he asks me every morning how Bronwyn slept, how many times she cried, and if she had a good night. So cute.

Then last night when I went in to check on her around 9:30, I tripped over something on the floor. I turned on the light to see Jesse curled up on the floor next to Bronwyn's crib, and Joel all cozy in her rocking chair--both sound asleep. Joel woke up as I moved him to his bed and I asked what they were doing and he told me that they were going to sleep in her room so that they could take care of her overnight so that I wouldn't have to. So sweet. I almost cried.

Then I told him that he could just enjoy being her big brother and I would worry about taking care of her because I love taking care of my kids!

Easter!

I'm not sure why the boys were standing so far away from me in the pictures with just me and them...I tried to get them to come closer, but as you can tell by the "action shots" of Jesse and Brody during the actual Easter egg hunt, they were very serious about their hunting and couldn't pull away for just one second to take a picture. This was even after I assured them multiple times that ALL of the eggs had been found. :)

Easter was a really wonderful day! We had an amazing worship service at church and then over to some dear friends parent's house for lunch and it was so good! The bigger boys (we call them the "J's") played with two little girls there and were most content--I even heard Joel and Jesse say to the hostess, "This food sure is delicious" and "I really like this lunch!". And the little ones (we call them the "B's") both slept almost the entire time. We actually sat at the dining room table for 2+ hours and had real grown-up conversation without breaking up one fight or changing one diaper!

5 years ago.

5 years ago this week...

We were adjusting to life with a 3 month old baby who had colic, reflux, and reactive airway disease.

Zac was desperately trying to finish his M.Div. degree at Denver Seminary.

I was a new mom desperately trying to get three consecutive hours of sleep and make it through the day without crying.

We were living in a little condo in north Denver.

I was diagnosed with cancer.

Life become so complicated in a matter of months, and we felt like we were bobbing below the surface of the water, just trying to get enough quick breaths of air to stay alive.

Here's our little family then:



This week:

Our 3 month old then is now 5 years and 3 months old, and getting ready to start kindergarten. He'll be in a regular classroom and is fighting the disease of autism. Tonight he wrote a story for me about how much he loves me!

Zac is now an ordained pastor and released his first album this past fall. He's amazing and it's so neat to see the seeds that God was planting in college and graduate school coming to fruition.

I am now a "seasoned" mom with four little people to care for, and still desperately trying to get 3 consecutive hours of sleep (ha!). Crying is now quite the norm in our household, although I'm happy to say that 98% of it isn't coming from me :).

We are living in a house that is just perfect for us in south Denver.

I am cancer-free and had one very encouraging doctor visit today. Apparently with my type of cancer, the 6 year mark is when my risk for the cancer spreading goes WAY down, but 5 sure is a good sign and we are praising God!! I've adjusted quite easily to the loss of vision and it doesn't slow me down one bit.

So thankful yesterday, singing praises to God in church on Easter, and standing amazed at the power of the cross. About what it means for us eternally, but also what it means for us in this life. There will most definitely be suffering, but we are never left in that place. Christ has secured for us an eternal victory and with that hope, we can worship him here in the valleys and on the mountaintops--whatever the years may bring.

Here's our expanded family 3 weeks ago when Zac baptized Bronwyn:



It's a little hard to get us all in a picture these days. I'll try and get some up from Easter soon. :)

Look, I'm alive!

See...here I am with my increased brood! I felt like I needed a picture with them all since 2 weeks after Bronwyn was born, I still had not one. I'd like to say it's just because I've been to busy to stop and get in front of the camera.

The truth is I don't like to look at picutres of myself weighing 30 pounds more than I used to. Oh well. This too shall pass (right??!!). I'd like to say that my kids don't notice and they love me anyway, but well, you read this. So I guess they do notice, but I also know they still love me.

Anyway, we are surviving. Although, we do still have help. I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little afraid to do this alone. But my new mantra is..."one ________ (fill in the blank) at a time"!

I wouldn't recommend....

passing the stomach flu around the house when you have a newborn. But that is what we have done here! I never want to get up multiple times in the night, feeling like I'm either going to faint or throw up, to nurse a baby again. Oh, how I tried not to breathe on her!!

Actually, Brody and Bronwyn are the only two in our house that didn't get it...praise God! My mom even got it right before she left--I think sharing the flu with her was a nice way of saying, "thank you for coming to help out!" don't you?! Hopefully, she'll come back again some time :).

But, knock on wood, we are all recoverd and hopefully this one will just pass on by the babies in our house.

Other than that, we are all doing well! Sleep deprivation hasn't totally hit yet, although it probably will in a few weeks. We've been blessed with wonderful food, visits, and gifts from friends and people at our church and we feel very loved and cared for.

The boys...oops...(I've got to get out of that habit now). The kids and I ventured out by ourselves yesterday to go to church. I figured I might as well try out the "single mom on Sunday" thing with 4 kids in tow now so I can just stare my fear in the face. It went fine and we all survived. At one point while we were trying to leave, Brody (or Houdini as we like to call him) slipped out of the double stroller and escaped out the door of church, right in front of my very eyes. I told Joel to run after him and grab his hand while I stopped the door from slamming the stroller. Zac came by at that moment and I yelled, "He got out!". It sort of seemed like I was talking about a dog who ran out of the house and I had to laugh. And Brody was certainly laughing as he made a beeline for the parking lot. He wasn't laughing when I strapped him (more tightly) back into the stroller. He probably feels like he's been demoted since Bronwyn's been born because now I make him stay in a stroller with her when we are out and about. I used to let him walk and would just chase him all over the place. I don't have that freedom anymore and neither does he. Oh well. I guess life's tough when you are 15 months old and a big brother!

Church was even followed up by all 6 of us taking a nap at the same time. I'd call that a success. The going away party we went to later that night...not so much. But that's another story :).

It's all about perspective...

Jesse (3 yrs old) asked my mom yesterday when I was going to get back to my "regular" size. Good question, I thought to myself, because I am more than ready after back to back pregnancies. But then I wondered if maybe he thinks me being really pregnant is my regular size since that's how I've been for almost half of his life...ha ha!