So as a follow-up to Brody's previous post, I will share some of my thoughts on the situation. You know, since our "special surprise" principally involves me for the next 7 months (I guess that's good, 2 down already).
Here are my fears:
Once this baby is born I will not be able to leave the house for 6 months straight.
Brody may not be even be walking when this baby is born.
I won't be able to give each of my children the individual time that they need as babies/little people (I want to cherish these times, not just survive).
How will we afford college when or if all four kids go in the span of 5 years?
Will anyone ever want to babysit for us again?
What does this mean for my eye and the treatments I was supposed to receive this year (finally able to proceed after Brody was born...)?
How will I take care of my children in the way that I want to when I am on the couch with morning sickness (and mine lasts all day, for more than just the first trimester)?
How will I go grocery shopping? (I know, when Zac is home but he works long, weird hours and sometimes you just have to get to the store, you know?)
And yet, after I get over the shock of the upcoming changes for our family, I am overwhelmed by God's timing, provision, and love. This was most definitely NOT a surprise for him. He knows all of my concerns and more, and he will carry me through them. And I know that this child will be a blessing--in the normal ways that we already anticipate, but also in ways that I have no way of even knowing yet! What a privilege it is to be a parent!
But more than anything, when I am feeling overwhelmed, tired, and discouraged, or organized, joyful, and energized--either way, I pray that this experience will bring me before the throne of God, my perfect heavenly Father who will supply all of my needs and grow me into the child that he desires me to be.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Friday, July 17, 2009
And baby makes four.
Hey there everyone! It's me, Brody! Comin' at you with some big news to share (remember, my mama mentioned it in my last post...it's time!)
Well...I'm going to have a little buddy like these guys coming this winter!
That's right! There's a baby in that tummy right there and it's only going to be 15 months younger than me :)
I know! Crazy huh?!
And don't worry, Mom, we promise to help out as much as we can!
I don't know why they are laughing, I'm serious about the help part :).
Well...I'm going to have a little buddy like these guys coming this winter!
That's right! There's a baby in that tummy right there and it's only going to be 15 months younger than me :)
I know! Crazy huh?!
And don't worry, Mom, we promise to help out as much as we can!
I don't know why they are laughing, I'm serious about the help part :).
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Exception
Except going to the pool Monday wasn't worth all of the extra work. Jesse had a huge tantrum/meltdown about an hour into it, and once his crying became contagious and Brody started in, we decided it was time to abort mission and head home. I was very frustrated with Jesse. He had plenty of snacks, it was a beautiful day, two of his friends were there, and we were swimming! What more could you want?! Sometimes he just gets on these kicks and there's really no snapping him out of it.
I did however, have a proud mommy moment. Joel was having a great time playing with one of his friends. They were jumping off the side of the pool and then swimming/walking back (it was only 3 feet deep) to do it again. They must have done it 40 times and Joel was thoroughly enjoying his new confidence in his water skills. I walked over and told him we had to leave. He did two more jumps and calmly walked back to our stuff and got ready to go. Those of you who know Joel realize what a HUGE moment this was for him. No crying, no negotiating, no tantrums (we're talking beyond 4 year old normal frustration and into I just cannot control my autistic self tantrums). We have been working, working, working on this--complete with a little story about self-control--and I am finally seeing some fruits of our labor! Praise God!
After dinner, we all went for a walk. Zac had a long talk with Jesse about how we were going to practice walking! Sounds weird, but ever since Brody was born, Jesse has insisted that I carry him everywhere. So unless I want to haul out the double stroller for quick little errands, I have resorted to pushing Brody in the stroller while carrying Jesse. Not a good habit for either of us and we are trying to break it. Jesse actually did a great job and walked all of the way to the park by himself. We are trying to make holding my hand way more special than it really is, but don't tell Jesse that, because he's buying into it!
And Joel decided that he wants to be "SuperWhy". Anyone seen that cartoon on PBS? SuperWhy is a little boy who turns into a reading superhero. They love it and Joel was trying to run so fast that his shoes would turn into rocket shoes and he could fly. He convinced himself that if he ran 5 miles, he would then start flying. It was hysterical watching his little legs running as fast as they could all over the neighborhood. He didn't fly, but he hasn't lost hope yet :). Since then, he's been asking me what other things SuperWhy can do. I've made sure to tell him how SuperWhy always cleans up all of his toys, is kind to his brothers, eats his food without complaining, etc. You know, the important things! :)
I did however, have a proud mommy moment. Joel was having a great time playing with one of his friends. They were jumping off the side of the pool and then swimming/walking back (it was only 3 feet deep) to do it again. They must have done it 40 times and Joel was thoroughly enjoying his new confidence in his water skills. I walked over and told him we had to leave. He did two more jumps and calmly walked back to our stuff and got ready to go. Those of you who know Joel realize what a HUGE moment this was for him. No crying, no negotiating, no tantrums (we're talking beyond 4 year old normal frustration and into I just cannot control my autistic self tantrums). We have been working, working, working on this--complete with a little story about self-control--and I am finally seeing some fruits of our labor! Praise God!
After dinner, we all went for a walk. Zac had a long talk with Jesse about how we were going to practice walking! Sounds weird, but ever since Brody was born, Jesse has insisted that I carry him everywhere. So unless I want to haul out the double stroller for quick little errands, I have resorted to pushing Brody in the stroller while carrying Jesse. Not a good habit for either of us and we are trying to break it. Jesse actually did a great job and walked all of the way to the park by himself. We are trying to make holding my hand way more special than it really is, but don't tell Jesse that, because he's buying into it!
And Joel decided that he wants to be "SuperWhy". Anyone seen that cartoon on PBS? SuperWhy is a little boy who turns into a reading superhero. They love it and Joel was trying to run so fast that his shoes would turn into rocket shoes and he could fly. He convinced himself that if he ran 5 miles, he would then start flying. It was hysterical watching his little legs running as fast as they could all over the neighborhood. He didn't fly, but he hasn't lost hope yet :). Since then, he's been asking me what other things SuperWhy can do. I've made sure to tell him how SuperWhy always cleans up all of his toys, is kind to his brothers, eats his food without complaining, etc. You know, the important things! :)
Monday, July 13, 2009
8 months and...
guess who is crawling?!
Zac!
Just kidding. It's really Brody and he is getting fast! It kind of took me by surprise because he started trying right before he turned 8 months old and now, two weeks later, has it down cold. Joel was 13 months before he crawled and Jesse was 10.5 months (although they both did this horribly sad looking wounded soldier army crawl for awhile first). Brody is also trying to pull up on things but forgets that he still has to hold on and then just falls right down.
Poor guy got a big bruise on his cheek from trying to stand in his crib :(. Silly me, I always thought the crib was a pretty safe place to be!
The bigger boys are enjoying his new mobility and put things in front of him to entice him to crawl...it's very cute.
Stay tuned later this week, Brody also has some other exciting new to share!
And now we are off to the pool. Not really a very easy outing for me to take 3 small children to the pool by myself (and get them all with sunscreen, suits, snacks, towels, toys, etc.), but they all love it and it's definitely worth the extra work.
Happy Monday!
Zac!
Just kidding. It's really Brody and he is getting fast! It kind of took me by surprise because he started trying right before he turned 8 months old and now, two weeks later, has it down cold. Joel was 13 months before he crawled and Jesse was 10.5 months (although they both did this horribly sad looking wounded soldier army crawl for awhile first). Brody is also trying to pull up on things but forgets that he still has to hold on and then just falls right down.
Poor guy got a big bruise on his cheek from trying to stand in his crib :(. Silly me, I always thought the crib was a pretty safe place to be!
The bigger boys are enjoying his new mobility and put things in front of him to entice him to crawl...it's very cute.
Stay tuned later this week, Brody also has some other exciting new to share!
And now we are off to the pool. Not really a very easy outing for me to take 3 small children to the pool by myself (and get them all with sunscreen, suits, snacks, towels, toys, etc.), but they all love it and it's definitely worth the extra work.
Happy Monday!
Friday, July 10, 2009
It shouldn't hurt.
So I want to know where medical professionals get some of their information. Because if it's not firsthand experience, then I'm always kind of leery.
"It shouldn't hurt". That's what the nurse at my retinal doctor's office told me about the laser treatment yesterday. Hmmm...that's very nice. Have YOU ever had this done?
Not my experience at all.
Let's just say I hope I never have to do that again. While my doctor was performing the laser torture, I mean treatment, he was telling me how some people just cannot handle it and have to have to be sedated and have it done at a hospital. He kept asking me if I was okay and I bravely told him to just keep going, thinking it had to be over any minute now.
Sheesh. Having someone push really firmly and directly on my eyeball with a glass ball-like thing, while shining a hugely bright light into my eye and then flashing even brighter lights intermittently that felt like I was being given repeated shots...yeah, didn't hurt a bit. Whatever.
Going into it, I thought nothing would compare to having a 1 inch piece of metal stitched onto my eye and left there for a week (my radiation treatment). And of course, this wasn't that bad. But, I'm not going to beg for him to do it again.
We are praying for success and for a true stabilization of the bleeding and swelling that has been occuring in my eye.
And just for the record, it was yeterday and today I feel completely fine :).
"It shouldn't hurt". That's what the nurse at my retinal doctor's office told me about the laser treatment yesterday. Hmmm...that's very nice. Have YOU ever had this done?
Not my experience at all.
Let's just say I hope I never have to do that again. While my doctor was performing the laser torture, I mean treatment, he was telling me how some people just cannot handle it and have to have to be sedated and have it done at a hospital. He kept asking me if I was okay and I bravely told him to just keep going, thinking it had to be over any minute now.
Sheesh. Having someone push really firmly and directly on my eyeball with a glass ball-like thing, while shining a hugely bright light into my eye and then flashing even brighter lights intermittently that felt like I was being given repeated shots...yeah, didn't hurt a bit. Whatever.
Going into it, I thought nothing would compare to having a 1 inch piece of metal stitched onto my eye and left there for a week (my radiation treatment). And of course, this wasn't that bad. But, I'm not going to beg for him to do it again.
We are praying for success and for a true stabilization of the bleeding and swelling that has been occuring in my eye.
And just for the record, it was yeterday and today I feel completely fine :).
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Ahhhh....
Just back from a little Girl's Night Out. Not nearly as wild as it sounds. Starbucks and talking.
Food for the soul.
I'm so thankful for girlfriends... Who else can you tell that you threw the dustbuster on the floor in anger and not worry about feeling judged?! And yes, that did happen. I'm not proud (long story). I even heard Joel trying to recap the situation for Zac that night and then Zac told him not to lie and make up things about Mommy. I sheepishly piped down from upstairs that, unfortunately, he wasn't lying. Zac looked at me like I was nuts.
On a different note, I'm getting ready for a laser treatment on my eye tomorrow afternoon. Feeling a tad nervous but am praying that it will be very successful. At any rate, it's a good excuse to have my mom come up and help me out with the boys for the evening since Zac's at work and I'm quite certain I won't be up to it (wink wink :). Thanks, Mom!
I'll send an update soon!
Food for the soul.
I'm so thankful for girlfriends... Who else can you tell that you threw the dustbuster on the floor in anger and not worry about feeling judged?! And yes, that did happen. I'm not proud (long story). I even heard Joel trying to recap the situation for Zac that night and then Zac told him not to lie and make up things about Mommy. I sheepishly piped down from upstairs that, unfortunately, he wasn't lying. Zac looked at me like I was nuts.
On a different note, I'm getting ready for a laser treatment on my eye tomorrow afternoon. Feeling a tad nervous but am praying that it will be very successful. At any rate, it's a good excuse to have my mom come up and help me out with the boys for the evening since Zac's at work and I'm quite certain I won't be up to it (wink wink :). Thanks, Mom!
I'll send an update soon!
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Happy 4th!
Celebrating yesterday reminds me to praise God for our nation (although imperfect) and the many blessings we receive from living here!
We went to a party last night at a friend's house and their neighbors lit off the most spectacular, private fireworks display I have ever seen. It just went on and on...I cannot begin to imagine how much money they spent :). And Brody, our little trooper, just slept upstairs in a pack and play through an hour of some seriously loud explosions. You gotta love the third child...I am pretty sure he could sleep through the sound of a tornado.
Speaking of sleeping through a tornado, last night we had the loudest thunderstorm at 1:30. It was so intense--complete with lightning, thunder, and sideways hitting rain that--I actually thought about turning on the news to see if there was a tornado warning and we should all be down in the basement. Of course, all of my men (the little ones and big one) were just happily sleeping away while I feared that we might blow away. It was scary! We have been having the craziest weather here this summer...so unlike Colorado!
I finally fell asleep when it was over, only to be awakened thirty minutes later by Brody who somehow soaked through an entire diaper and his pajamas--from head to toe. Poor guy. I'm not sure how that happened. It's like he had some extra bottles stashed somewhere in his crib and snuck a few before he fell asleep. My night was sort of starting to feel like some weird twilight zone episode. Needless to say, I think I only slept about 3 hours total but still felt somewhat rested in the morning.
This morning Brody was sitting on my bed when Joel came in to say good morning. I love to see the look on Brody's face when he sees Joel in the morning or after he's gotten up from a nap. He has the hugest smile and flings his arms around in excitement. I'll try to get it on photo because it is just SO sweet. Anyway, that happened this morning and Joel smiled back. I said, "Joel, Brody loves you so much and he always has a big smile when he sees you!" Joel said, "And I always get the biggest smile when...(I am assuming he's going to say "when I see Brody, too!")...I see my friend, Helmsley!" Oh, okay. He has a serious friend crush on this little girl, so I shouldn't have been surprised, I guess!
Yesterday when Zac told Joel that he loved him very, very much, Joel responded by saying that he loved Helmsley very much too. Oh my. We could be in for it!
Hope you are all having a wonderful 4th weekend!!
We went to a party last night at a friend's house and their neighbors lit off the most spectacular, private fireworks display I have ever seen. It just went on and on...I cannot begin to imagine how much money they spent :). And Brody, our little trooper, just slept upstairs in a pack and play through an hour of some seriously loud explosions. You gotta love the third child...I am pretty sure he could sleep through the sound of a tornado.
Speaking of sleeping through a tornado, last night we had the loudest thunderstorm at 1:30. It was so intense--complete with lightning, thunder, and sideways hitting rain that--I actually thought about turning on the news to see if there was a tornado warning and we should all be down in the basement. Of course, all of my men (the little ones and big one) were just happily sleeping away while I feared that we might blow away. It was scary! We have been having the craziest weather here this summer...so unlike Colorado!
I finally fell asleep when it was over, only to be awakened thirty minutes later by Brody who somehow soaked through an entire diaper and his pajamas--from head to toe. Poor guy. I'm not sure how that happened. It's like he had some extra bottles stashed somewhere in his crib and snuck a few before he fell asleep. My night was sort of starting to feel like some weird twilight zone episode. Needless to say, I think I only slept about 3 hours total but still felt somewhat rested in the morning.
This morning Brody was sitting on my bed when Joel came in to say good morning. I love to see the look on Brody's face when he sees Joel in the morning or after he's gotten up from a nap. He has the hugest smile and flings his arms around in excitement. I'll try to get it on photo because it is just SO sweet. Anyway, that happened this morning and Joel smiled back. I said, "Joel, Brody loves you so much and he always has a big smile when he sees you!" Joel said, "And I always get the biggest smile when...(I am assuming he's going to say "when I see Brody, too!")...I see my friend, Helmsley!" Oh, okay. He has a serious friend crush on this little girl, so I shouldn't have been surprised, I guess!
Yesterday when Zac told Joel that he loved him very, very much, Joel responded by saying that he loved Helmsley very much too. Oh my. We could be in for it!
Hope you are all having a wonderful 4th weekend!!
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